entertainment industry coach question 306: Why do people say yes to looking at my reel and then they never get to it?

He continued on a rant which I'll just sum up with a "why bother saying yes in the first place?"

I can't read people's mind. There are many reasons why people say yes to watching your reel and don't. Here are a few:

1. It's on their to-do list and they will get to it.

2. They had every intention to, but life and work got in the way.

2.5 you continued to follow up with them and as your attitude got more resentful, your follow up got more obnoxious (and they either felt too guilty to contact you or just thought you were a jerk)

3. You put them on the spot when you asked them to watch the reel in the first place, and like a girl who gives out a fake number, they said yes, to end the awkwardness.

4. They think your reel stinks and they don't know how to tell you so they're avoiding the situation.

5. They misplaced your reel and they don't want to admit it.

6. They thought your reel was so great they passed it onto their agent and they're waiting to find out if he's going to take you on as a client so they can share the good news with you...

I can make up stories all day. It's probably what you've been doing. I noticed two stories in your rant. The bottom line is, you, me, and everyone we know, will NEVER know the actual reason.

All you can do is go back over the conversation of when you gave the reel to them in the first place. Were you professional? Were you in rapport? Did their physiology and tonality align with their "yes?" Did you ask them to watch it by a specific time and tell them that you'd follow-up accordingly?

If you feel good about how you handled the situation, then let it go. I have a pile of DVDs of people's documentaries, short films, feature films, and pilots, that they gave me, and I had every intention of watching them. The people range from ones I've met once at a speaking engagement to clients I've had for years. I still want to watch them. If I were living in a movie, it would be Duplicity, and one of my "selves" would watch them, while another self was blogging right now and working 16 hour days, and another self was on a romantic getaway in Hawaii, and another self was back in NY visiting my family and friends.

Unfortunately, there's just one me. And yes, I'd feel awful if someone was ranting about me for not watching something they gave me, the way you were ranting about "some people not watching your reel." But as awful as I'd feel, I can only do so much. I am doing the best I can with what I have. I'd like to think that everyone out there is doing the same. It sure beats some of the stories I made up in this blog.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit, www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 305: What is the first thing you'd have me do to kick off the new year?

Normally I'd ask for a little more information, but because I know who you are and that you're a cameraman, I would suggest that the first thing you do to kick off the new year is:

Update your contact list. Re-rate everyone 1-5 based on how well you know them. Then, re-establish relationships with all of your 2s and 3s. Set a goal for yourself to get those 2s and 3s up to 4s and 5s in the next six months.

The new year is a great time to re-establish relationships because it's the typical time that people make resolutions, one of them being "re-organizing their office." Get back in touch with people because while "re-organizing your office" you came across their card or an old call sheet.

What is it that Kim Kardashian said last week, "Little white lies don't hurt anyone." And if you're feeling to guilty, then it's a great excuse to re-organize your office.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 304:How do I deal with New Years drunks, when I don't drink?

The same way you deal with them every other day of the year. Listen, I know it can be annoying having a drunk person spitting all over you, and all the other unpleasantries that come with someone who has had one too many, but if you're going out to celebrate the new year, then focus on that. Have fun! Let the drunks be merry, and you be as far from them as possible should they feel the need to get sick.

And if you don't normally go out, because you don't like to be around drinkers and New Years is the exception, that just be understanding that people all have fun in their own way.

Hey, at least you won't have a hangover.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.theGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 303:How do you make real, sincere friends in a city full of hucksters and posers?

Family you're born into, friends... you choose. When you're young, you are put into forced social situations, like school, where you find your "group." The groups shift and expand as the grades get higher and smaller grade schools merge into larger middle schools, and finally everyone into one high school.

And then off to college. A whole new group of people with whom to assimilate. Perhaps, you're still forced into social situations like dorms, classes, sports, the Greek system, making it easier to sort for the like-minded people.

As we are sent out into the "real world" of being an entrepreneur, which make no mistake, you are as an entertainment industry professional, the forced situations aren't as readily available.

When I first moved to LA away from my friends and family in NY, I met a lot of "doozies." My sister referred to them as my "Freshman Year Friends." The similarity is clear: a new place, brand new people, and the longing to connect and have that familiar feeling you have with your "old friends," can cloud your judgement.

Be patient. There are certainly "hucksters and posers" in this city, but remember, that's your perspective. Those hucksters and posers have a whole circle of friends who think they're the coolest guys since James Dean.

Finding like-minded people means being open to the possibility that all of the wonderful and real people (by your definition) are out there. You start by finding one. That one person will have more friends whom you will likely connect with and they'll tell two friends and they'll tell two friends, and so on and so on...

Also, do what you love to do. If you love the beach, go to the beach. If you love sports, get onto a team. You're most likely to find people you connect with doing what you love to do.

The most important thing to remember is to focus on your reason for being here. Don't let anyone throw you off your game because they're not your "type." Do your job, and do it well, and before you know it, you'll be surrounded by great people.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.theGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 302:How do you get your portfolio to the right people?

The question continues: "... without jealous and/or unprofessional people trying to stop you and/or make you look low quality?"

I will address the second part of the question first. Only YOU can let people stop you. People can be jealous and unprofessional and therefore not help you. In that case you need to meet new people who will.

Also, no one else can make your work look low quality, right? You are the photographer, therefore you are deciding the equipment you use, your lighting, and making all of the decisions that produce your finished work that you put in your portfolio.

Now to address the first part of the question: How do you get your portfolio to the right people? Depending on the industry of photography you're in, you'd be targeting different people. Movie and TV set still photographers, target studio photo editors.

1. Find out who judges the portfolios in the area of photography you're in

2. Contact their office to find out their submission policy and what format they want the portfolio in

3. If they don't accept unsolicited materials, ask who they accept materials from (reps, agents)

4. Contact those reps and agents

5. If after all of this, you still can't get your work seen, let me know and I'll start from the basics about creating relationships and getting referrals

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 301:why do so many people ignore my friend requests on Facebook?

Facebook is used by different people for different reasons. I personally use Facebook for getting back in touch with friends and family whom I wouldn't otherwise be in touch with and to help people in the entertainment industry.

When I get a friend request from a friend or family member, accepting their request is a no-brainer. But here's were it gets tricky (and I've changed the way I'll be approaching new friends in 2010 because of it). When I get a friend request from someone who doesn't send a message and we have a no friends in common (or maybe even a few), I immediately look them up to see if they are in the industry. If they are, I accept the friend request. Many people, however, have privacy settings, so I can't see any information about them. I ignore those. The bottom line is, my Facebook page is open to the public, so they can read my blogs and get my information. If they want to be my friend, I want to know why.

For me, it's not a race to see who can have the most friends. If a stranger wants to friend me I want to know why. In the past year, I've sent friend requests to many camera people whose names I've known from the Guild. I knew I had value to offer them as a friend because I blog every day. Still, because I didn't send a message, a few wrote to me before accepting and asked who I was and how I knew them. When I told them I knew their name for years because I worked at the Guild, it put their mind at ease, and they accepted.

If you want more people to consider your requests, I suggest sending a message as to why you want to be their friend. It could say something like, "we have mutual friends in the business and it's always nice to meet like-minded people," or, "I work as a ____ and you are a ____, I enjoy connecting my friends when opportunities present themselves."

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 300:can you talk about getting over FEAR, the biggest career killer?

Thank you, for the SO many GREAT questions submitted for number 300. I will address them all, though for 300 I chose this one because of something that just happened in my life.

Before I tell you about that, I want to agree with the person who asked this question. In my opinion, after coaching over 1000 people one-on-one, from anywhere from once to 9 years and counting, the lack of action due to FEAR is the number 1 killer of careers.

For you, I blog, create products, give seminars, coach, all with the desire to give you solutions to overcoming your fears.

I once offered a group of 15 people who'd been making progress, but not as quickly as they liked, (because of fear obstacles) an opportunity to compete for a $100,000 prize that a "successful client" had offered, to the person who showed the most action in one year's time. When asked who wanted to participate, 100% of the hands were raised. Armed with all the tools I'd given them, they created action plans for the year, eager with anticipation, armed with the taste of competition and the guarantee of a payoff at the end, should they win.

After sharing these outstanding action plans, that would indeed, catapult their careers, I asked where had this "drive" been for the past 6 months they'd been working with me? They laughed, and told me that it was both the love of competition and the knowledge that there was 100K at the end.

Then I informed them, that there was a slight adjustment: No "successful client" had put up 100K. As I looked at the deflated expressions on their faces, I reminded them, the element of competition hadn't changed. In fact, the prize had not changed, for with each of their action plans, was inherently the opportunity to make 100K upon succeeding. NOW each of them had the possibility of getting the 100K as opposed to just 1.

Do you think that cheered them? Nope. While I'd just shown them, how they EACH had the opportunity to make 100K, instead of me choosing just one of them, because there was no longer the "guarantee" that the money would be there in the end, it completely deflated their drive. And then the "reasons and excuses" started...

Well, I'm sorry to tell you this, but there are no guarantees in our business. In fact there are no guarantees in life. The story I told you I'd share at the beginning of this blog is this:

On Friday, I went to dinner and to see Avatar with my sister and a friend (both non-pro). We left inspired, excitedly talking about the many ways it moved us. It was a great night! One of those nights that I felt proud to be in this industry, realizing that what we do, causes our family, friends, and complete strangers to be WOWed, to think about "a bigger picture," to escape the stresses of life for a few hours, to immerse themselves in another world, to have fun. What we do touches so many lives...

But that's not what my story is about. As we hugged each other goodbye and said what a great night it was hanging out, talking, and seeing a great movie, my sister and I had no idea, that 15 minutes later, we'd get a call from our friend that he's just been in an accident. We turned our car around and raced to the scene where the police took his statement of the car, that had pulled out onto Beverly Blvd, completely oblivious to his motorcycle, and then took off, as he lay on the ground, the back of his helmet deeply scratched from landing on his head.

With my hand on his back and arm, holding him steady as the police filled out paper work, I could feel him trembling. He was clearly in shock. Then he said, "It's amazing, a few minutes ago, we were having such a good time, a really great night, and then in a split second... this"

I will continue to give you solutions to battle the fears that you create for yourselves. But I ask you, with life as precious and unpredictable as it is, how long are YOU GOING TO CHOOSE to let them stop you?

for more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 299:What do you do when a teacher discourages you about your work?

I have created this question based on a comment I received yesterday regarding a post I put on Facebook about a movie that I'd just seen and loved:

"I have a problem with that movie, I like it a lot, but mainly because I wrote a short-script almost identical... I never showed that script because my screenwriting teacher told me it was a good exercise but a bad idea for a movie, because there were no public in Mexico that wanted to pay for that kind of movie. I believed him..."

Teachers are voices of authority in our society. They teach because they are "experts." But let's face it, teachers, like development execs, and like agents, don't know everything. Listen to feedback, it's important, but if the voice that is speaking loudest about your work, is the voice in your heart, then THAT is the voice you should be listening to.

If I had listened to every person who told me "I couldn't do that," I wouldn't have a resume. The film industry is a risk. You take a chance that a story that is important to you will be well executed, and well received. It may not be, but if you want to tell your story, then don't let someone else tell you no!

That, said, you now have a second chance. I'm sure your short film is not identical, and you can change the bench scene to something else. There are only, what? Seven "original" stories. Your voice is what makes your story unique, so now that you know there's a market out there for this genre, maybe blow off the dust and give it another shot.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, the Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 298: Does it ever get easier being away from your family on the holidays because of work?

I would imagine not, if you have the kind of family who has a big traditional holiday celebration. You will always be missing out on the memories and the time spent with those you love, on the years you can't be with them.

I made a choice to move away from my parents and friends when I came to California. It was a sacrifice that had to made to pursue my career. Does it get easier to be away from them? Quite the contrary, it gets harder every year.

I've often written about the "nature of our industry" and weighing the pros and cons. If you were not born in Southern California and had to relocate here for work, leaving behind family and friends, that may be a huge "con" for you. It's a choice.

My suggestion to you is that you make the time to see your family in between jobs and be very present in every moment that you're with them. Create memories, and cherish the time you spend with them. You may find that you are in fact lucky compared to those who have their family near by, and quite possibly take them fore granted.

Again, it's all how you choose to live your life and treat the people in it.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 297: From 1 workoholic to another, can I take Christmas off?

Absolutely, unless you have a daily blog. Then you have to answer a short question that will provide value to those who are work-o-holics like us and are actually reading your blog when they should be taking a few well deserved days off.... hint hint.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visit www.theGreenlightCoachBlog.com

entertainment industry coach question 296: Should I let someone produce my feature film without paying me for the script?

I feel like I've answered this question before or maybe I've just lived it. Either way, you always want to create a win/win, without biting off your nose to spite your face. If given the choice, everyone would be paid for their art/talent. That said, if you are trying to build your credits, you have never had your writing produced, and you are suddenly given the opportunity, it may be worth it to you.

As I started with, you want to create a win/win. I'm assuming you're not being paid because it's a low budget, non-union production company. They want to produce your script because they believe in it. Therefore, talk to a literary agent, manager, or entertainment attorney, who can give you some advice on signing a contract to receive money should it sell. You may also be able to add a few more things to the contract in the event that the movie "takes off."

The reason I advise you to speak to a professional, is because, without contract experience, you could end up losing a lot of money. Number people can be very tricky, and it may not even be the production company you're dealing with now, but the one that they sell to.

Approach it like you would a pre-nup, with love, trust, and "a teensy need for insurance." You appreciate the opportunity, you believe in the producers, and therefore, you want to know that they are just as invested in your success in the end, since you're willing to sacrifice in the beginning. If a contract is going to be a deal breaker, you have to decide if getting your first screenplay produced is worth it. Either way, congratulations on getting this far.

For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, the Greenlight Coach, visit www.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com