Thursday, December 30, 2010
entertainment industry coach question 665:How do you make real, sincere friends in a city full of phonies?
Family you're born into, friends... you choose. When you're young, you are put into forced social situations, like school, where you find your "group." The groups shift and expand as the grades get higher and smaller grade schools merge into larger middle schools, and finally everyone into one high school.
And then off to college. A whole new group of people with whom to assimilate. Perhaps, you're still forced into social situations like dorms, classes, sports, the Greek system, making it easier to sort for the like-minded people.
As we are sent out into the "real world" of being an entrepreneur, which make no mistake, you are as an entertainment industry professional, the forced situations aren't as readily available.
When I first moved to LA away from my friends and family in NY, I met a lot of "doozies." My sister referred to them as my "Freshman Year Friends." The similarity is clear: a new place, brand new people, and the longing to connect and have that familiar feeling you have with your "old friends," can cloud your judgement.
Be patient. There are certainly "phonies" in this city, but remember, that's your perspective. Those phonies have a whole circle of friends who think they're the coolest guys since James Dean.
Finding like-minded people means being open to the possibility that all of the wonderful and real people (by your definition) are out there. You start by finding one. That one person will have more friends whom you will likely connect with and they'll tell two friends and they'll tell two friends, and so on and so on...
Also, do what you love to do. If you love the beach, go to the beach. If you love sports, get onto a team. You're most likely to find people you connect with doing what you love to do.
The most important thing to remember is to focus on your reason for being here. Don't let anyone throw you off your game because they're not your "type." Do your job, and do it well, and before you know it, you'll be surrounded by great people.
For more tips and articles by top entertainment industry career coach, The Greenlight Coach, visitwww.TheGreenlightCoachBlog.com
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